Fashion, Style, and Confidence

Marianna Jaross

I have become curious about the intersection between style, psychology, and feeling good about ourselves. Specifically, the way in which we can use fashion and style as a form of positive behaviour activation, exploration, self-discovery, and creativity.

In an interview with Gabrielle Arruda, renowned style consultant David Kibbe states: “Style is our visual language of presenting ourselves to the world. It is how we tell our story.” He adds that it “has to come from the core of who you are.”

Importantly, he adds that there is a relational element to style: “Style is how you communicate with others because it’s a reciprocal thing… it’s really an energy that we put out so that we get it back, and that we can continue to create together.”

Let me break this down from my perspective.

We can use fashion and style as a form of behaviour activation: This is the psychological concept of scheduling a meaningful or pleasant activity to support our wellbeing. For example, I might schedule a morning swim even if I don’t ‘feel’ like it; and know that I will good once I am in the water (and after). This helps me build a positive routine.

Similarly, I might wear an outfit that lights me up to help make myself feel a particular way on the premise that the way we present ourselves can have an impact on how we feel about ourselves, and the interactions and energy we receive back from others. That is, we can use our style as a supportive behaviour activation.

I like the thought of using style as a potential tool to support ourselves. 

Here are the specifics:

1. It is an opportunity to give us a pep in our step.

When we pick an outfit thoughtfully and with intention as to what makes us feel good, we are communicating to ourselves on some level that we care about ourselves and that we matter. 

2. When we feel good, we can emit an energy that says “I’m here and I am ready for the day.” 

My grandma is an excellent example of this, and is probably more fabulous than most people I know: She still gets her hair done and takes pride in her appearance, and people still talk about how iconic she is. This is about showing up like she cares about herself, and people can feel it. 

3. When we take the time to consider what makes us feel good, authentic, and genuine; we carry ourselves differently. 

This isn’t about chasing trends, or clocking up expensive items: It is about tuning into ourselves and what we like and feel good in, and carrying ourselves with this alignment.

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Overall, this is not about becoming appearance-based, buying expensive items, or copying someone else; nor it is saying that style choices are the answer to deeper mental health challenges, outside circumstances, or systems that aren’t supportive.

Instead, this is about using style as a potential avenue to help us tune into ourselves, show we care about ourselves, and potentially communicate with others. It can be a portal to access our authentic expression.

Style may be part of a conversation with our inner self and the outside world; and we have the opportunity to make it an interesting one.

© Marianna Jaross 2025 

Please note: This article is independent of my professional associations and workplace(s).

References

Gabrielle Arruda, 2025, February 13. The Power of Style with DAVID KIBBE!! YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AzTudT1e8XQ